2 cents for Breda

Breda had a real life incident/confrontation/encounter/whatever.

Here’s the original – at a glance – some good stuff in the comments

a supporting post by Labrat @ Atomic Nerds

and Breda’s follow up.

First, let me state for the record: I have personal space issues. My personal space rules are adapted from what I know of the old Soviet Air Defence forces: If you’re in my airspace without authorization, I’m gonna shoot you down.

(I read the comments @ Breda’s so I’m pretty sure this would be where pawnbroker tells me I might have a negative influence on my impressionable readers and I should have a care how I phrase things.) Piss Off.

I meant what I said. My personal space is exactly that – MINE. My most valuable possessions are kept there – ME.

Touch me for no reason and I’ll mess you up. If you’re lucky, I’ll be polite when I offer to help you up. You will not get a warning.  I will not, as pawnbroker said,

“…retreat, retreat, retreat, until you cannot retreat any further…”

I am not in any way motivated to retreat in a situation where some unrepentant, unapologetic stranger has walked up and not just violated my space, but actually touched me. All my self defense training teaches confrontation as a last resort. If you’ve been touched, confrontation has begun. You have no idea what the stranger’s intent is, but s/he is CLEARLY aggressive and it is time to REACT. I have taught students, small-build women especially, several techniques for taking control of situations like this.

I suspect the main point of Breda’s story deals with her self-awareness and dealing with a natural or ingrained passive/submissive/victim auto-reaction. She had to fight down that knee jerk reaction and substitute the newly awakened Armed Librarian/I don’t have to take this crap/I can defend myself/refuse to be a victim/whup-ass reaction.

As I’ve said in previous posts, winning confrontations is not about fighting, it’s about convincing the aggressor to quit.

If a lil’ whisp of a gal can back off a linebacker with the look in her eye, who in their right mind is moronic enough to find fault with the look she chooses?


Posted on December 15, 2008, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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